I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
