what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize