Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
