worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
