she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
