Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
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