I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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