Those balls look pretty dangerous.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
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