a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
birth control should be required to get into college
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize