Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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