pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize