somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
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