So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
