We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
