Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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