Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Just invented taco cereal.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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