when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize