My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
