I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
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I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
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These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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