I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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