i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
