Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
