All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
