you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
