and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
did i walk over a car last night?
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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