Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
this beer tastes like vomit already
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.