Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I just found a bag of teeth...
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
