Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
third nipple confirmed
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize