We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
