Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
