I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
