I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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