Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
