Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I just want to make out with him forever
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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