I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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