Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
