Duck Duck Cougar?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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