Three words: puerto rican gang bang
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
