I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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