it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Randomize
