oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
