I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
this hospital has no fireball
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
