I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
