I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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