Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
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