Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
