this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
