You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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