the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
