what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
