bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.