I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Randomize
