This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
