hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize